Sister, BFF, Sissy, Sis, Best Friend... Yes, I have used these terms of endearment, not frequently, but I have used them. I have actually always been sort of leery when it came to these. I remember being somewhere with a friend, someone I lovingly called sissy. Someone asked us, "Are you guys like best friends?" We looked at each other, having never given that particular title any thought, and just laughed. I think one of us said, "She's my sister." We chuckled and that was that. My hesitancy to use any of the colloquialisms came with validity, in my opinion. With a title came expectations and responsibility. Also, I had been abandoned on several occasions by some who chose to endear me with one or more of the aforementioned titles. As I explained in [girl] Friends...How many us have them? I have grown close to women but in most instances there are still walls up, very tall ones. I have let a few in, in a few areas but I am not sure there is not one that has complete access. The idea of sisterhood is not foreign to me but I am still learning why it is important to indulge in a sisterhood. In fact, up until this past weekend I struggled with rather sisterhood was even necessary, especially after age 30.
Over the weekend I had the pleasure of attending a tea party which focused on a few things but the one that stuck out was "Sisters Helping Sisters". What a notion! Sisters HELPING Sisters?
Sure, some may not think it makes a difference but it unquestionably does. Sisterhood matters. I am not talking about the facade of being BFFs with a woman you share the same parents with. I am talking about a genuine bond;unity.
Sisterhood: congenial relationship or companionship among women; mutual female esteem, concern, support, etc.
For years I thought my brothers were all I needed. Before 15, I was probably right. Once I started growing up and developing, I realized a sisterhood was much needed. I needed someone to bounce ideas off. I wanted someone to offer "womanly" advice that wasn't so motherly.
Sisterhood is beyond just having someone to hang with on a Friday night. It supersedes the designated driver position. And it is much more than having a set of friends to sit around the table and gossip with over ice cream. Sisterhood or the lack thereof plays a vital role in a woman's life. Women often join sororities or participate in a women's ministry at their local church. Some just find sisterhood amongst a tight knit group of friends. However it is found, I have come to the conclusion that all women need a sisterhood.
There was a portion of the tea party where the floor was open for Q&A. Instantly a safe place (which is extremely important) was created for women to ask pretty much anything and receive answers and suggestions from others. A woman shared her questions and concerns to a very personal matter. As I observed, I noticed there was absolutely no judgement and no negative reactions. She was able to gain support from those whom surrounded her and they poured out to her with compassion and love. I listened and I watched and then it downed on me, "This is why you need a sisterhood."
Not only was there support throughout the entire event but there was so much wisdom imparted; another reason sisterhood is meaningful. We often make the life experiences of others trivial. What we may not realize is some of our sisters have gone through things simply just to impart wisdom in the lives of others.
During the tea we heard awesome testimonies of women and how they overcame drug addiction, lives of promiscuity and other unimaginable things. As they spoke I could tell that they had learned some pretty hard lessons but they were left with so much wisdom. I am not sure about anyone else but after I encounter instances as powerful as this I want to sit and derive all they are willing to pass on.
As women shared and others listened, tears streamed down faces, young and old. One thing that circled all through the event was comfort. Comfort knowing that your sister had been there. Comfort knowing your sister will be there. Comfort knowing that you had others there to hold your hand. There was comfort knowing that if there was ever a need, it wouldn't be taken lightly. This is why a sisterhood if imperative.
When women are empowered they are more equipped to empower others. After the event I felt so empowered, so uplifted, it gave me the urge to empower others. When I reflect on not only this particular event but others in which attendees departed with much more wisdom, courage and inspiration than when they arrived, I am convinced that a genuine sisterhood is essential.
Thankfully, I haven't completely given up on the concept of sisterhood. The desire is there. I am actually more inclined to do what I need to do to become a better sister in hopes that the right sisterhood will find me.
What is your take on sisterhood? What have you gained from sisterhood?